If we are going to participate in a community read that has the possibility of creating healing in our communities, then we will eventually have to get past any enforced or artificial politeness and find ways to be respectfully honest with each other and ourselves.
While I do not speak for the students at Cascadia or anyone except myself, I can say I know white people who get uncomfortable around non-white people, and part of it is being worried about saying the wrong thing. I've come to see it isn't a simple matter of saying something insensitive/ignorant/racist, yet going deeper and seeing that those words are connected to thoughts inside your head, which are connected to other actions and behaviors in your life-whether you are conscious of it or not. These actions/behaviors do affect others, whether we intend them to or not.
I have also heard from a few non-white people that it takes a fair amount of energy to deal with white people who are uncomfortable around them (and again no one elected me to speak for them, just telling you what I've heard). First of all you want to decode whether they are uncomfortable because they are unfamiliar with someone who looks like you, because they are worried about saying the wrong thing, because they are indeed racist or some other reason? Then you may have to decide on how to act in terms of trying to help them feel comfortable around you. I cannot imagine how frustrating this is, as even if you decide you don't want to worry about anyone else feeling comfortable around you- you still have to expend energy to hold onto that as you walk through this world.
Alright, so now I am not exactly sure where I was going with this post. It was mainly thinking about how do you get past what can initially be awkward and really get the conversations starting.
We talked in class at Cascadia about how local tribes did NOT live in tipis, they used cedar planked longhouses. It is a painfully small step, yet hopefully one in the right direction. Where shall we go next?
You can not be afraid to speak to others and ask questions.
ReplyDeleteJust keep this in mind, think about the people who are not the majority in every situation, do they feel comfortable and also think how easy it is for you to be around people like you and how hard it can be to not be around people like you or even have the option.
I agree in theory, it is just in practice it isn't always that simple- the asking questions part at least.
ReplyDeleteI also agree that those in the majority should consider how it feels for those not in it. We need to get past our own fears and approach people as individuals and with respect.